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The last official post with my weigh in was December 28, so it seems fitting that I should post again on January 28. You can check out my last weight in post by clicking here. I've been somewhat frustrated with the band in general because I thought it was going to severely limit what I could eat, and generally, that hasn't been the case. I have been filled twice and still struggle with the desire to eat, but that is getting easier with time. The other thing that has proven a lot easier is not drinking food during my meals or for 30 minutes after. When you limit your liquid intake, the food stays with you so and it takes longer to feel hungry again. I thought that would be a struggle, but I'm used to it and there is rarely something I eat where I feel I need to have a drink to wash it down.
I suppose most people don't read a weigh in post for anything but the weight. This morning, I came in at 269 which is 11 pounds lost since December 28 and a total lost of 55 pounds since November 1. I'm certainly not complaining about how much I continue to lose. Maybe I should simply be grateful that I don't have the eating issues that are so common with a band surgery. When I got married in 2002, I weight 265, so in a week or so, I will be the smallest I've been in almost 9 years!!
Jan 28, 2011
Jan 18, 2011
Taking It to the Limits
This weekend was not the best weekend I've had since I had my lap band put in. I have felt for some time that I can eat too much and went to have the band filled twice due to those feelings. I told Sandra that I want to eat like a small child. Until this weekend, I had never really pushed to see how far the band would really allow me to go.
You've probably heard jokes about a fat guy at a buffet. I know I've heard them and told them. This weekend, I was that guy. My small group got together on Sunday which is pretty normal. Since there was a bunch of football, we decided to watch and had people bring good football food...sausages, hot wings, chips, queso...all the good stuff. It is absolutely amazing how quickly you revert to your old habits. I just kept grabbing more and more food because it was so good!
The band finally told me to stop. Actually, it felt like it took my insides and twisted them up and tied my stomach into a giant knot to the point that it hurt to even drink water. I have taken my band to the limit and I did not like it at all. I managed to put a pound or so back on with my poor choices this weekend. It might be easier to lose with a band, but you can obviously get around it. I'm back at it now and determined to keep moving in the right direction.
You've probably heard jokes about a fat guy at a buffet. I know I've heard them and told them. This weekend, I was that guy. My small group got together on Sunday which is pretty normal. Since there was a bunch of football, we decided to watch and had people bring good football food...sausages, hot wings, chips, queso...all the good stuff. It is absolutely amazing how quickly you revert to your old habits. I just kept grabbing more and more food because it was so good!
The band finally told me to stop. Actually, it felt like it took my insides and twisted them up and tied my stomach into a giant knot to the point that it hurt to even drink water. I have taken my band to the limit and I did not like it at all. I managed to put a pound or so back on with my poor choices this weekend. It might be easier to lose with a band, but you can obviously get around it. I'm back at it now and determined to keep moving in the right direction.
Jan 7, 2011
Band Fill Video
Yesterday, I drove over to Cheyenne to get my band filled again. I am getting a lot of restriction on my band and currently only have 6 cc of fluid in there. She told me it was pushing pretty hard against her when I drank the barium. I can tell you that I definitely notice more restriction this time than I did last time. You can read about what the fill process is like by clicking this link.
I wanted to be able to show people what it was like as much as possible and you could actually see how the band works. They allowed me to use my cell phone to record the video of how my body handles food and drinks after I swallow them. First, I'll start with this picture of the band and port. It will help the video make a little more sense. You see the darker part over my spine that curves down and to the right...that is the barium inside me. The small part is the actual opening of my stomach and then you see it spread a bit once it goes through the banded section of my stomach. Now watch the video below and you will see how it works. I drink the fluid, you see it stop and fill my esophagus, then travel through the limited opening and spread through the stomach. This is just liquid, so imagine how it works with food. I was really surprised to see how small the opening actually is. Anyway, I posted my 50 pounds weight loss on the 5th and this morning, I dropped another 1.5 so I think going to the gym definitely has the positive impact I'm looking for. Have a fantastic weekend.
I wanted to be able to show people what it was like as much as possible and you could actually see how the band works. They allowed me to use my cell phone to record the video of how my body handles food and drinks after I swallow them. First, I'll start with this picture of the band and port. It will help the video make a little more sense. You see the darker part over my spine that curves down and to the right...that is the barium inside me. The small part is the actual opening of my stomach and then you see it spread a bit once it goes through the banded section of my stomach. Now watch the video below and you will see how it works. I drink the fluid, you see it stop and fill my esophagus, then travel through the limited opening and spread through the stomach. This is just liquid, so imagine how it works with food. I was really surprised to see how small the opening actually is. Anyway, I posted my 50 pounds weight loss on the 5th and this morning, I dropped another 1.5 so I think going to the gym definitely has the positive impact I'm looking for. Have a fantastic weekend.
Jan 5, 2011
Milestones
I haven't done much in the way of setting goals for myself through the process of weight loss. I know I'd like to weigh somewhere in the neighborhood of 200 pounds or less when all is said and done, but there are no smaller goals that I've been working towards. I did a very poor job of eating and working out over my Christmas break, but still managed to continue losing small amounts of weight. Last night, I made it back to the gym and huffed and puffed my way through some weight machines and some time on the elliptical. It felt so good to be back at it. Yesterday was also cool because I weighed in at 274.8 which puts my weight loss at 50 pounds!
It seems strange to say I've lost 50 pounds in 65 days. It makes me wonder how I would do if I were to focus just a little harder on my time in the gym. Our good friend Shelly stopped by last night and was talking about the work she's doing to get ready for a 10k that she is going to run. I have no goals like that. I just want to weigh less and be healthier. Sandra has mentioned she might be interested in doing some sort of run like that. I'm not sure if I use things like my bad knee or back as an excuse because I'm scared to actually try. I'm sure if I focused on it, I could accomplish so much more than I ever thought.
I've had many thoughts in my head since I had surgery about who I am as a person. How did I ever allow myself to get as large as I did? What if I fail? The hardest thing I deal with right now is people pointing out how much I've lost to me, or especially commenting about how good I look. I think I spent so long being big that I feel I don't deserve any kind of praise. Sort of an, "I did this to myself" kind of thing. It just seems awkward and I don't know how to respond. I have this mentality that I don't deserve good things because of what I have done. That's a hard struggle. It's not like I'm depressed or having crazy negativity going on. I feel really good physically and I am starting to finally like how I look. It's hard to explain.
Regardless, I think it might be good to work on some other milestones in this journey. Maybe I should work out a plan with Sandra to try to run a 5k, or perhaps I could set up a plan to lose a certain amount of weight by a certain day. My birthday is May 21, so should I set a goal of losing 100 pounds total by the time I'm 31? What sorts of goals do you have?
It seems strange to say I've lost 50 pounds in 65 days. It makes me wonder how I would do if I were to focus just a little harder on my time in the gym. Our good friend Shelly stopped by last night and was talking about the work she's doing to get ready for a 10k that she is going to run. I have no goals like that. I just want to weigh less and be healthier. Sandra has mentioned she might be interested in doing some sort of run like that. I'm not sure if I use things like my bad knee or back as an excuse because I'm scared to actually try. I'm sure if I focused on it, I could accomplish so much more than I ever thought.
I've had many thoughts in my head since I had surgery about who I am as a person. How did I ever allow myself to get as large as I did? What if I fail? The hardest thing I deal with right now is people pointing out how much I've lost to me, or especially commenting about how good I look. I think I spent so long being big that I feel I don't deserve any kind of praise. Sort of an, "I did this to myself" kind of thing. It just seems awkward and I don't know how to respond. I have this mentality that I don't deserve good things because of what I have done. That's a hard struggle. It's not like I'm depressed or having crazy negativity going on. I feel really good physically and I am starting to finally like how I look. It's hard to explain.
Regardless, I think it might be good to work on some other milestones in this journey. Maybe I should work out a plan with Sandra to try to run a 5k, or perhaps I could set up a plan to lose a certain amount of weight by a certain day. My birthday is May 21, so should I set a goal of losing 100 pounds total by the time I'm 31? What sorts of goals do you have?
Jan 3, 2011
A Whole New Wardrobe
I'm something of a pack rat. It really drives Sandra crazy but I don't like to get rid of things because I might need them again at some point. This is especially true of my clothing. When I started the Lap Band journey, my pant size was up to 50x30 and was boring a 52" waist. I have been wearing 3x shirts for a number of years now. So every year when people would buy me clothing for Christmas, they would usually get things that had no real chance of fitting. I would graciously accept them and when I got home, they would make their way to the back of the closet with the tags left on them. Unless you are willing to pay high prices, you won't find many clothes that would fit someone this large outside of Walmart or Kmart. That is where almost all my clothing has been purchased for at least the last 3-5 years. Kmart was always the best for pants and Walmart would mark down the 3x polos every six months or so and I'd stock up. I could never bring myself to get rid of the clothes that didn't fit for some reason, no matter how many garage sales Sandra made us do.
When we were packing for our trip to Denver over Christmas, I decided to try on some of the old pants I'd saved. I looked through the piles and realized the smallest size I had saved had a 44" waist. I knew my current pants were definitely loose, but I didn't expect the 44 size to fit perfectly! I have about seven new pair of pants that I can wear again - at least four of those still have the tags on them. Knowing I was already that much lower in my pant size forced me (or maybe encouraged me) to try out the shirts. I went through all the shirts I'd stored away and pretty much have a brand new wardrobe. There are so many shirts that still had tags on them and many more that just hadn't seen daylight since my first son was born. I now have so many shirts and I'm excited to wear all this new gear.
The other weird thing that has changed since surgery is temperature...I can't handle it really cold anymore. For the first time since I was probably in my early teens, I want to wear slippers and sweatshirts. I'm sleeping with a down blanket on top of my comforter and there are times when Sandra gets hot and I'm still doing just fine. It is so weird to have all these changes taking place. I'm going again on Thursday to have another fill in the band. Hopefully it will give me the restriction I am looking for.
When we were packing for our trip to Denver over Christmas, I decided to try on some of the old pants I'd saved. I looked through the piles and realized the smallest size I had saved had a 44" waist. I knew my current pants were definitely loose, but I didn't expect the 44 size to fit perfectly! I have about seven new pair of pants that I can wear again - at least four of those still have the tags on them. Knowing I was already that much lower in my pant size forced me (or maybe encouraged me) to try out the shirts. I went through all the shirts I'd stored away and pretty much have a brand new wardrobe. There are so many shirts that still had tags on them and many more that just hadn't seen daylight since my first son was born. I now have so many shirts and I'm excited to wear all this new gear.
The other weird thing that has changed since surgery is temperature...I can't handle it really cold anymore. For the first time since I was probably in my early teens, I want to wear slippers and sweatshirts. I'm sleeping with a down blanket on top of my comforter and there are times when Sandra gets hot and I'm still doing just fine. It is so weird to have all these changes taking place. I'm going again on Thursday to have another fill in the band. Hopefully it will give me the restriction I am looking for.